Taking a Giant Leap

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Those of you that have been around these last few years, or that have dug through the archives and poked around are aware that since the beginning, my weight has been something I’ve felt the need to address to make the most of my golf game. To be truthful, it’s something that affects my health and life beyond golf.

It’s also something I’ve struggled mightily with since a very young age.

After a lot of research and preparation, about a week from today, I will be undergoing a surgical procedure to help me with weight loss, and hopefully to get the weight off, and keep it off for good. The procedure is known as a Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy.

I’ll leave the gory details for you to Google, but I want to talk about the situation some more detail.

I can’t remember a time in my life where I wasn’t overweight to a fairly large degree. At birth, I was 11 lbs., which I’m told is bordering on ridiculous, but it didn’t bother me any (sorry, Mom!). I think I was relatively normal in early childhood, but it wasn’t long before I was putting on weight.

Who knows what the factors are for something like that. Genetics? Psychology? Societal factors? Upbringing? I don’t know, but the situation is what it is.

I have believed since I started Life in the Rough that losing weight would be critical to my success. And I’ve tried 100 different ways to make that happen. I tried many times before Life in the Rough, and many times during. I tried named diets, I tried just changing habits, I tried tools like food journaling. Nothing has been successful.

I know a lot of you are thinking that it’s a simple mathematical formula of calories in and calories out and that all that needs to happen is for me (or any overweight person) to eat better and exercise more.

I implore you to believe me, it’s not that simple. No one wants to be in a situation like this. Maybe I’m weak or undisciplined. Or maybe there are genetic or biological factors that cause me difficultly. I don’t know, but I do know that I need a tool to help me succeed.

And that’s exactly what this is: a tool to help me succeed. It’s not a magic pill. It’s also not something decided on the spur of the moment. I’ve been researching and preparing for this since October. Nearly 11 months ago, I started this journey within a journey.

Last April, I read something about how one of my favorite players, John Daly, had tackled his own weight problems. Of course, I was highly interested, and learned that he had a surgical procedure called a Lap Band. I read up on it and was interested, but I kind of dismissed the idea because it felt like I would be “taking the easy way out” or “giving up”.

Around that time, I had a visit with a respiratory physician to address my newly diagnosed sleep apnea. He told me that weight is a factor and if I lost a bunch, it would probably go away. He’s the first person that recommended surgery to me. Again, I felt I could do it on my own and I felt the negative connotations of surgery.

Yet another failure. By summer, I had basically given up. Again. In late summer, though, I had given it some more thought and by chance, heard that there is a bariatric weight loss surgery program at my local hospital. Figuring I had nothing to lose, I went in for a personal consultation and then for a group information session.

I was quite surprised to learn that with lap band and sleeve gastrectomy procedures, the risk of complication is very low, and the long term success rate is very high. I had heard of gastric-bypass procedures before and about the serious complications and about how the success isn’t great for some people, so it wasn’t really ever an option for me. These other procedures, though, warranted more exploration.

From there, participation in the program (and health insurance coverage) demanded a lot of medical testing, psychological testing, nutritional education, supervised dieting, and support groups. This long process gave me a lot of time to take in all the facts, as well as to seek out information externally, to make a certain and informed decision.

With the vertical sleeve gastrectomy, part of the stomach is removed. I know, it sounds awful and dangerous and like something too drastic to even consider. It might seem that way, but complications are very low, and unlike the gastric-bypass, it doesn’t change the way the digestive system works. I just restricts the amount that can be consumed. Also, the part of the stomach removed is part that has to do with the amount of chemical that the body uses to trigger hunger, which as those of us who have dieted know, is one of the biggest sources of difficulty.

What seems awful and dangerous and too drastic to consider, to me, is diabetes, borderline high blood pressure, sleep apnea, lack of energy, arthritis, as well as risk of heart attack, cancer, and who knows what else.  It’s something that greatly diminishes quality of life. Not only that, but let’s forget life and death for a moment and consider why I’m here in the first place. I absolutely believe without any doubt that my weight has a detrimental affect on my golf game, in a number of ways.

So, that’s the situation in a nutshell. I definitely realize that there are many of you who don’t understand the need for something like this and maybe you never will. But there are also many of you reading this that should probably be giving it some thought.

At this point, I have already begun a pre-surgery high-protein diet. The purpose of which is to shrink up my liver a little, reducing the chance of it getting in the way during the procedure. On Monday, I will be consuming clear liquids only, in preparation for surgery. The procedure is first thing Tuesday morning.

I will have to stay overnight in the hospital. Assuming there are no leaks in the staples and assuming my digestive system functions as expected, and assuming everything else is fine, I should go home the following afternoon. I’ll be home from work for two weeks, and away from golf for about four weeks.

I’ll be on a soft diet for four to six weeks, at which point, I will begin to be able to introduce normal foods again. I’ll have to take a multi-vitamin every day forever and make extra certain that I always stay hydrated, and be sure to eat sufficient protein at each meal, which are all things I’m willing to live with.

While I’m anxious to move on with it, I’m also fearful of the unknown. Just being on this pre-surgery diet has been more mentally difficult than I ever expected. Knowing I’ve not succeeded with weight loss in the past makes me have that kernel of doubt that I can succeed now. Especially since, as I said at the top, this isn’t a magic cure, it’s a tool. It’s still going to be incumbent upon me to change life-long bad habits.

I certainly don’t relish the idea of getting surgery of any kind. I know that things can go wrong and that my life is literally in the hands of others. There’s a minefield of complications that are possible (though statistically very unlikely).

I’m definitely feeling the anxiety of the situation. But I’m also sure that I’m making the right decision. There’s too much to gain to not do this. I know all the risks and the down sides, and they don’t even come close to the risks and down sides of not doing it.

Part of me wanted to not even tell you all about this and just do it. But that would be kind of ignoring a big part of what it’s going to take to get me where I want to be. And another part of me typed all this out to make sure I’m really as convinced as I think I am. And yet another part of me realizes that there are some of you in the same situation that can benefit from knowledge of my experience.

Stay tuned in the coming weeks for updates mixed in with regular posts. I’ll let you know how everything turns out. If you want to know more about my experience feel free to leave comments and ask questions and of course, you’re welcomed to contact me privately, if you prefer.